(Originally written in 1991 for a high school English assignment, age 18).
What is maturity you may ask. Maturity occurs in a person when they are old enough to know right from worn and from the sillies to the seriousness. A mature person can take on many responsibilities and be trusted at the same time.
Mature doesn’t mean having good manners in one public place and then going home and raising a little something that lots of people have done. What it means is to be behaving right for your age and always, not “acting out your IQ number” like some people used to say.
From my opinion, I feel like I’ve been a mature person for a long time. There are other people who will agree with me, and yet there are those who wish to oppose, but that’s their own opinion.
I’m only human, and I act the way I want to, regardless of what other people think of me. There are many people who think I have a sick mind, and that’s what sometimes leads them into believing I haven’t matured.
There is a little kid inside each of us that is always saying things or talking to us. That’s where they get the phrase that, “she’s a kid at heart” or “she has the heart of a little kid.”
What really made me realize that I’m mature is the fact that I’ve gone out with a few guys. When I was going out with them, I sometimes let other people decide what I should do in that relationship or if I should end it. I wasn’t having the greatest homelife at the time, so I broke off a relationship with a guy I had gone with for three months. I thought it was what everybody else wanted and it would make them happy. The one who came out not so happy was me.
Over the past year, since I haven’t gone out with him, I realized how much care I had for him once again. He made me laugh as well as cry. After all this, I learned to stick up for what I believe in no matter what others think. If this isn’t being mature, I don’t know what is. As I speak now, I’m in the process of wanting to get our friendship back and work from there. Times like these don’t pass by you every day.
The only area that I haven’t quite mastered in being mature in is the fact when somebody really ticks me off, but they don’t know it, it’s sometimes hard to tell them. It’s even harder when the person is your best friend. I gave it my all to be best friends with her. If she asked me to do something for her, I most all of the times have.
What bugs me even more is that she talks about me behind my back and then acts as if everything is okay. Well, it’s not, and I’ve been put down by her many times, and she doesn’t realize she does it. It’s always alright if things go her way, but it’s a crime for somebody else to have or be doing something she’s not.
Things should be better after high school because I don’t have to face her every day thinking what she’ll say next that may cause me some anger. I’ve realized not to try and please her, and give her everything she wants because it’s not worth my time and I’m sick of being strung along on her string. It’s about time to cut the string, which I should have done a long time ago.
People told me that’s what to watch out for, but I didn’t want to believe it. It goes to prove that sometimes your best friend is virtually your worst enemy. I feel more mature knowing the fact that this is real, and at some point it would help to get it out in the open. But, this is not the right time to start saying anything. It’s a good feeling to know I can still stand up for what I believe in, and it’s not lying to my friends and taking them for granted.
(My teacher used a red pen when making comments and writing the grade. At the end, she told me, “Good Job,” and gave me an “A” as a result.)
Have you ever saved any of your old writings from school? Looking back, and reading what I wrote at the age of 18, I realize how much I’ve grown, matured in my life. I have a new lens and perspective from which I view the world.
For many years of my life I went astray. Lost, wandering, and wondering who I was. I allowed other people to define me, my worth, tell me where to go and what to do.
I am grateful now more than ever for the gifts God placed in me! In His own timing, He revealed a special blessing, one of validation.
Being me is okay! There is nothing to be embarrassed about!
I am proud of who I am!
I delight in God for He uniquely made me for a specific purpose and a plan!
I know I am not perfect.
I know brokenness is a part of who I am.
I know the courage and the strength it takes, to take a stand, speak up, let your voice be heard and take pride in who you are.
I know you may feel shame.
I know there may be guilt.
I know there may be burdens.
Don’t let these things consume you.
Keep your light burning bright each day.
Keep listening.
Keep writing.
Keep praying.
My darling, you are well on your way.
***(Ps…I’m 48 years old now. My high school paper was written 30 years ago.)***
Magnificent Meraki 